Effective communication: 8 ways to be assertive in conflicts without sounding 'Rude'

Our words go a long way in maintaining any relationship, be it personal or professional. What truly matters is our tone when we talk to people. It is important to consider all the factors, like your feelings, thoughts, and needs, that should be clearly expressed. In this process, being assertive is a crucial step to not being perceived as rude or aggressive. Let's see a few ways to stay assertive during communications on a personal or professional note without sounding rude.

8 ways to be assertive in conflicts:

1. Understand the Difference Between Assertiveness and Aggression

Assertiveness is a process where you express your thoughts and feelings in a respectful manner without showing aggression, which might disrespect the other person. This process needs to be done by understanding the situation and analyzing ways to talk to balance between the two parties.

2. Use "I" Statements

During this type of conversation, choose ''I'' statements to express your needs and feelings to make it clearer. For example, instead of putting blame on the other person saying, 'You never listen to me,' try saying, 'I feel unheard when you interrupt me.'. This sounds more like your feelings rather than being rude to the other person.

3. Practice Active Listening

Active listening is simple. You need to put your full concentration on what the other person is trying to tell and respond thoughtfully. Show them that you value their perspective and you are listening to them by maintaining eye contact and summarizing the points when you respond to it. Do not try to summarize things in your head to respond quickly; listen to them first.

4. Set Clear Boundaries

Setting boundaries is vital for assertiveness and defining your needs and wants clearly without any confusion. Setting effective boundaries and deciding on what is okay and what is not. You can be nice and also put your point out without sounding rude if you can set clear boundaries.

5. Stay Calm and Composed

No matter how hurt you are or how angry you are, try to stay calm throughout the conversation to help the other party put forth their point without feeling threatened. If you are finding it difficult to stay calm, try deep breaths and stay focused on the issue. Do not raise your voice or show aggressive body language, as it can disturb the situation.

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6. Practice Saying No

Saying no is a vital part of being assertive in conversations. It might sound a little arrogant, but you need to learn to politely decline a few requests that you cannot fit in your schedule without feeling guilty. For example, you can politely say, "I appreciate the offer, but I have other commitments that I need to prioritize."

7. Use Positive Body Language

Your body language shows a significant role in how your message is received by the other party. Stay calm, like standing or sitting up straight, maintaining soft eye contact, and using open gestures without showing aggressive behaviors.

8. Be Honest and Direct

It is important to be honest during assertive communication. You need to state your thoughts and feelings without dragging the topic too long. Make sure that your honesty is not portrayed as aggression.

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