7 messaging mistakes to AVOID on dating apps; Check here
Online dating offers endless options, from mainstream platforms like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge to niche communities such as Singles with Food Allergies or Mullet Passions. However, no matter which app one chooses, certain messages should always be avoided
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A survey conducted by FindingTheOne.com among 1,000 UK singles revealed the most frustrating messages people receive. Dating experts also shared tips on how to craft better opening lines.
The Most Hated Opening Lines
According to the survey, 78% of respondents disliked receiving a simple “hey” or “hi,” considering them unoriginal and lazy. The infamous “You up?” was also a major turnoff, with 72% of participants saying it ruined the mood.
Avoid Clichés and Small Talk
Cheesy pickup lines were frowned upon by 59% of singles, and generic small talk like “How are you?” wasn’t much better, annoying 65% of respondents. While compliments may seem like a safe choice, phrases like “Hey beautiful” or “Hey handsome” were also unpopular.
Messages That Come Across as Insincere
Nearly half (48%) of those surveyed disliked the phrase, “I never usually message first,” as it felt disingenuous. Additionally, poor spelling and grammar were deal-breakers for 61% of singles.
The Issue with Dead-End Responses
Messages consisting only of emojis or short, dismissive responses such as “k” or “lol” were a source of frustration for 38% of users. These responses often lead to stalled conversations with no real engagement.
Stand Out with Unique Messages
Dating coach Hayley Quinn suggested that instead of using common phrases, people should aim for originality. For example, rather than asking, “How was your weekend?” one could say something more engaging like, “OMG, how is it Monday already?” or “Did you wake up thinking, ‘Wow, that was a great weekend’?” These variations ask the same question but in a more dynamic and memorable way.
Add a Playful Challenge to Show Sincerity
Quinn advised against excessive flattery, as it can seem insincere. Instead of showering someone with compliments like, “I love your smile and it’s so cool you do yoga,” one could mix in a light challenge by asking, “I see you’re into fitness—do you ever swap yoga for trail running or hiking?” This approach keeps the conversation balanced and signals genuine interest.
What to Say When a Profile Lacks Information
If a person’s profile doesn’t provide much detail, Quinn recommended three strategies. First, prompt them to share something unique by asking, “What’s one thing I’d never guess about you?” Second, add a bit of playful intrigue with a message like, “Something about your profile isn’t adding up…” Finally, reference something in their photos, such as, “Is that Santorini in the background? I’m planning an island-hopping trip too, but I’m sticking to Asia because of my pad Thai obsession.”
By using creative and personalized messages, online daters can increase their chances of meaningful connections while avoiding the pitfalls of common, unoriginal openers.
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